Secrets of Selfless Love and the Golden Rule
Your thoughts, which you are responsible for, are as real as your deeds. You will begin to realize t...
You have heard people say, "You must love yourself first, before you can love others".
Well, we have observed many selfish people (jerks) doing that, who do nothing to help anyone but themselves, and they're still miserable themselves.
But if you love others first, you become a good person. If you help others, how can you not feel good about yourself also? IT'S IMPOSSIBLE NOT TO LOVE YOURSELF ALSO when you love others first. That being so….
What we would call true Love, is simply Unselfish Love. Unselfish Love radiates to all without exception, so powerfully that it transcends your separate self and IS The Creator’s Love flowing through you, to others.
You become the vessel that is ‘channelling’ the Universal Spirit (while also being the Universal Spirit). It gives to all who would receive. It is like a Sun that gives warmth, light, and life to all, in all directions simultaneously.
If your love is not one that gives to all and loves all, then it is a selfishly based love. If you experience jealousy or possessiveness, then it is selfishly based love, not true Love, not pure Love, not unselfish Love. That virtually no one truly loves, or experiences receiving true Love, is unfortunately true.
By being giving and unselfishly loving, warms the heart and is beneficial to the giver and the one who is being given to. Unselfish Love is its own reward. The Universal Spirit is Love. We are like faucets and the Universal Spirit is like water.
When you open up, by using your free will, and let the water flow from you to everybody, you are constantly being filled with the water as it passes through.
But if you close the faucet off because you mainly desire to keep the water for yourself, it doesn’t flow through you, and you are left empty.
Which sadly, is what many people do? And the people who are thus empty because they don’t outflow their Love, then start looking in a different direction for something to ‘fill them up’.
If a relationship diversion won’t do it for them, if they are not loving and getting love from their relationships, which always eventually happen, they will do other things.
Even if they stay together with someone, they must look for diversions to fill the emptiness of the lag of love and God in their hearts and lives.
Desperately they start thinking ‘intellectually’ constantly keeping the brain busy so they won’t be aware of their emptiness. They pursue selfish pleasures and amusements of all kinds.
They go from diversion to diversion – food, games, clothing, movies, TV, sports parties, social clubs, hobbies, lovers, shopping, cars, candy, you name it. But there is never any peace, and never any real or lasting satisfaction – only a temporary fix.
And like the drug addict who needs a fix, the more it gets, the more it needs/wants. But the pleasure never lasts, and the feeling is never the same as the joy you get from giving, and ultimately, the connection to the Universal Spirit is made through giving.
They are left with that hollowness again, and the need to find some other distraction.
Most are looking for love, looking to replace love, and doing everything but what they really need to do to find it – give it.
Pay close attention to the following. The word ‘love’ has come to mean two very different things. In fact, the meanings are essentially opposite.
But most people don’t ever think of it, and continue to use the exact same word (love) for both things. The first kind of love could be called pure love.
Pure love is an outflowing, giving, caring kind of love – it could also be called unselfish love. Pure love is the kind of love that is related to things like “love thy neighbour”; Santa Claus; caring love for your family and friends; charity; helping disaster victims; etc.
It is the kind of love that the selfish side of you gets nothing out of, but that the good side of you gets a warm feeling from.
The other kind of love that is commonly referred to is actually nothing like pure love. It is really just a feeling of pleasure that comes with getting something you want or like (physically or emotionally).
It doesn’t matter if it comes from someone somehow giving you something you like, or from self-indulgence. It is all self-gratifying.
So let’s call that kind of love selfish love. Here are just a few examples: “I love ice cream”; “I love football”; “I love presents”; “I love chocolate”; “I love the islands”; “I love BMWs”; “I love beer”; etc.
Such selfish love also crosses over into our relationships. “I love Sam” (or “I love Lisa”) for instance, can actually mean you just love the attention, energy and pleasure they give you.
Relationships can involve a mixture of selfish love and pure love, but many start with (and are actually based on) primarily or totally selfish love. And many relationships break up because of that.
When a relationship is based on the self-gratifying pleasure you get from your partner, it results in a sort of addiction to some extent or other. You can then end up with addictive behaviour – jealousy, possessiveness, rejection and all the other selfishly spawned causes of pain and turmoil that come with such addiction.
Pure love, being the opposite of selfish, creates no addiction. It craves nothing for itself. It thus heals rather than hurts. It cares rather than blocks out and ignores. It can improve your life, the lives of those around you and, ultimately, the whole world.
Totally pure love is not contaminated at all with selfishness, or selfish love. This is important, because like any contaminant, selfishness can taint and ruin everything.
Love and compassion are the highest vibrations we can manifest in our physical, conscious life. When we do so, we are in harmony with the Universe and the will of God, and are his co-creators.
It is best explained in the golden rule “do unto others as you would have them do unto you” if you were in their situation. Just do it, and see what happens.
This is the real scoop; first love the Creator with your entire mind, all your heart and all of your soul. Love your friends and neighbour and be your brother’s keeper.
He said, “As ye do it unto the least of these my children, my creation, ye do it unto me.”
This is the law of the universe and nature. “As ye would that men should do to you, do ye even so onto them.”
It is simple in words, yet so deep in meaning, so far reaching in its application in every phase of human experience. The golden rule is to love unselfishly, to focus on and give pure love.
Pure love encompasses all the spiritual virtues involved with simply being a good person. For example, caring, kindness, compassion, tolerance, sharing, giving, harmlessness, respecting the free will of others (if harmless) etc. are all results of loving unselfishly.
Pure love isn’t unconditional love – you can be unselfishly loving and still put your foot down. In other words, one who applies the golden rule in life is reasonably kind, reasonably giving, but not unconditionally kind, unconditionally giving etc.
This teaching gives examples of the benefits of living by the golden rule, and how to apply it more in your life, in many different circumstances.
For instance, the techniques and methods in this script can help you have more caring interactions with everyone everyday, from cashiers or bus boys to your spouse. But you can take it even further if you want to.
In our opinion, working on applying the golden rule with others of a like mind can provide you the greatest opportunity for personal, spiritual development.
We strongly believe that if even a few people committed their lives to developing the virtues of being a good person, and then secretly recruited friends and family, with time it would spread from one person to the next, and eventually create a new and better society.
This is a striking allegorical fantasy to clearly illustrate a fundamental difference between a world of people who are looking out for themselves first, and a world of people who make caring for others their first priority.
That’s what the golden rule is all about. In a nutshell, this exemplifies living by the golden rule, or not living by it. But it’s more than that. It truly represents the real difference that living by the golden rule could make in our world.
It shows us how unselfishly loving others is not only pure love, but pure, real spirituality.
And even if you cannot change the world so profoundly, it still represents what kind of a spiritual world we can eventually live in if we live by this rule, thereby making ourselves deserving citizens of the Universe.
One of the beauties of the golden rule is its total universality. It goes beyond being just non-denominational and Omni-denominational. As you will note, the issue of religious persuasion or faith is irrelevant.
Assuming that people were of various persuasions, it was their pure love or selfishness that ultimately made the difference in their circumstances. The division between the happy place and the miserable place wasn’t between Christians or Buddhists, Jews or agnostics.
The thing that separated those people (as it does in reality as well) was whether or not they’d learned that living by having pure love was more important than the variations in their belief systems. And that’s what this is all about.
The concept of the golden rule applies to all good, caring, giving people, regardless of religion, faith or lack of it. It is a universal law and principle that anyone anywhere can use to improve their life, the lives of those around them and, ultimately, the whole world.
Isn’t that incredible, exciting, amazing and wonderful. The golden rule has a variety of typical definitions, which essentially all have the same meaning.
Sometimes it’s interpreted as “do unto others as you would have them do unto you”, or “love thy neighbour as thyself”. We would add “do no harm to others” and “think of others first” to that list.
They are all good definitions in our opinion, and you can see how they are reflected in the above.
But those definitions and sayings are really by-products of pure love or unselfishly loving others. Pure love covers them all, and is the mother of them all.
So to clarify the definition used, when we say living by the golden rule, we basically mean living by unselfishly loving others.
The same principle is also a belief of all basically good people, religious or not. It can include those of any faith as well as those who have no faith.
You may disagree, but it appears that based on these words, as long as someone obeys the commandment to love one another, they are followers of the Universal laws.
But denominational labels and semantics aside, it is our opinion that those who indeed live by that beautiful golden rule behave in a most spiritually responsible manner.
In any case, following the golden rule means being a caring, spiritual person regardless of label or affiliation. In that sense, as we said earlier, the golden rule is strikingly (and wonderfully) Universal.
If you really think about it, there are few things that are so cross-cultural and Universal. Perhaps the most Universal is a smile.
Raising your hand as a sign of friendly greeting might be considered an insult or hostile gesture in some cultures, but a smile means the same thing to all people everywhere, and no language is necessary to communicate its meaning. Music can often cross cultures too.
But when it comes to a cross-cultural spiritual or moral concept, the golden rule has no rival.
While people often disagree on religion and politics, almost everyone can agree on the goodness and rightness of living by the golden rule, regardless of culture or religious belief.
Thus it’s an ideal in which all kind-hearted people can join together towards the common goal of manifesting pure love and its virtues (kindness, compassion, tolerance, peace, sharing, giving etc.) in tangible ways, for the mutual betterment of themselves and all creation.
The great need for the golden rule is as simple as the rule itself. All over the world people are suffering. Even those who seem to be happy often actually have a painful, empty pit inside them that they attempt to ignore by constantly chasing after diversions, distractions or fun.
Alcohol and drugs are used to try and cope with it sometimes too, even in the best of families and amongst the wealthy who have everything they want (materially). Then, of course, there are the various wars and oppressions.
So, what’s the problem? Why can’t people be happy and live in peace and cooperation? If you look at the world objectively, and at people’s lives, you can trace all problems to one thing – selfishness.
That’s right, just that one thing. If you thought greed or hate were the big problems, you’re right, but think further.
Greed is just one aspect of selfishness, one branch. So are hate, lust, theft, starting wars, killing, jealousy, envy, arrogance etc., etc. All of those branches of selfishness have sub-branches too.
For instance, the reasons some people lose their jobs, the destruction of a rainforest or over fishing to extinction are branches of greed. But again, greed is just a branch of that one thing. You name the problem – its real source is selfishness.
Unlike the common phrase “fight fire with fire”, you usually get better results fighting fire with water. So what better way to fight selfishness with than it’s opposite – unselfishness.
Enter the golden rule, the answer and the cure to all of life’s problems. Once that is clearly understood, the only trick is implementing it in your life and helping others do the same. Which brings us to the next prerequisite – understanding the source of selfishness.
Selfishness is a result of separation, an outgrowth, and outcome, of being separate. Separate from what? From everyone and everything else. Separate from others, separate from nature/the universe/The Creator.
If you totally feel and believe that you are a separate being from everyone else and everything else in the universe, it’s naturally you against the world. Me first. Look out for number one. From that separate perspective it all makes total sense.
However, the truth is that we are all one creation – scientifically and spiritually speaking.
Looking at it scientifically, without a religious or spiritual view, scientists know we are all made of the same essential stuff. They also know that the universe is one thing, one energy, forming unimaginable numbers of parts of creation.
Even if you take the stance that humans have simply developed self-awareness through evolution, nevertheless it is this self-awareness that is behind humans seeing themselves as separate, and getting out of harmony with everything else in the universe and nature.
With that self-consciousness, you have the separate self-contemplating it is me- against-the-world (or against the Universe) scenario.
Rebelling against the laws and principles of the Universe caused a separation or cut off from the oneness and again, suddenly, there was the separate self-contemplating it’s me-against-the-world (or against the universe) scenario.
So, anyway you look at it, the result is the same. The I, me, mine thinking and behaving begins and with that, greed, jealousy, fear, intolerance, hate, arrogance etc., and all the problems that creates.
But we all have both a selfish side (that contributes to those problems) and a soul, spirit or good side. Other than the humans who let their selfish side control them, everything else in the universe functions as one harmonious system.
Disjointed, separate thinking and behaviour interferes with that harmony, and creates disruptive ripples in the pond that can cause pain and suffering. And when those ripples we create hit the edge of the pond, they bounce back in even more complex patterns.
Again, selfishness and its endless cycle of desire and fear causes all the problems in our personal lives, as well as the world.
For those who don’t deliberately make themselves blind, because of their selfishness and fear, it’s easy to see. Once you have identified the problem, you can find a solution.
In this case, since the real problem behind everything is selfishness and separation from the universe, the solution is unselfishness, transcending the illusion of separation, and returning to oneness and harmony with the universe.
Anything that can help that process (as long as it’s harmless) is a good thing, as far as we are concerned.
The golden rule and its resulting virtues are thus a big key, and the perfect way to achieve the above goal. Even if living by the golden rule doesn’t achieve that lofty goal, it’s still a win-win situation, because you become a better person and feel better for helping others.
It just makes common sense.
Ironically, while the golden rule is intellectually well known by almost everyone, it seems to be stuck in some intellectual filing cabinet within the dusty archives of people’s foggy memory and brains. It’s amazing when you think about it.
The golden rule is probably the most vital, positive, constructive principle in the world (in both a spiritual and practical sense) and it’s always been just sitting there right before us, waiting for us to notice it, take it and use it. It’s likely we even heard about it from our mother or family when we were children.
There in the recesses of our mind is this incredible, powerful, yet simple, universal, commonsensical means of developing true spirituality, improving our lives and the lives of others.
It’s so simple, so basic yet profound (in a real sense) but it’s often not even thought of by most of us as we search for spiritual knowledge, truths and beliefs.
And even if it is thought of, it’s often not thought of as being as significant as it really is. Or it’s just misunderstood, ignored, or given up on. But all that is changing.
The golden rule seems to have been lying dormant within the hearts and minds of many good people like some kind of spiritual time capsule waiting to be opened.
Well, the useful truth of the golden rule has been around a very long time, yet it seems that only now is it really beginning to be generally received and practised by many people. Its time has finally come.
The response we have been getting to the idea of people implementing the golden rule in their lives is remarkable. People everywhere are experiencing an awakening of the rule within them.
And as they start living by this rule, and discussing its simple beauty with acquaintances, friends, family and neighbours, some of them respond to it too.
In this time of so much change and turmoil in the world, the common sense embodied by the golden rule is creating a common spirituality, and is spreading at a grass roots level.
Many can see that it is a movement that will eventually spread among like-minded individuals throughout the world.
The time you spend developing your own unselfish love, and on spreading it to others, is invaluable. It is simple in words, yet so deep in meaning, so far reaching in its application in every phase of the human experience.
“The greatest service we can do for the Universal Spirit is to serve others. The greatest services to others is awakening them to the Universal Consciousness that lies within them, and helping them free themselves from their selfishness and their separate self”.
He presented love on levels, identifying the highest love in this often quoted passage:
“No greater love has a person, than to give up his or her life for another” — not literal death, but giving up self’s or egos desires for another’s. It is thinking more of what another may need than what self may want. This is a secret prayer you can repeat to yourself, “Others, Dear, others.”
This kept the power that flow through you on the right track — not glorifying yourself but revealing the Light and Love that flowed through you — The Creators love, our Father’s and Mother’s love.
Selfless loving is the ideal — giving, caring without expectation of getting something in return.
Yet, this must not be self-destructive. No one must accuse you of being a doormat of self-deprecating love. You too must often radiate tough love. Those around you often needed truth, justice, and a clear position on the laws and principles of the Universe, not pampering.
You should care so much for others that you would not let them remain in their darkness or misunderstandings. Yet never condemned them. Rather, call their mistakes to their attention.
You must also be aware of their inability to handle the full truth, choosing to be patient:
“I have yet many things to say to you, but you cannot bear them now.”
In our personal search for spiritual understanding, nothing will empower and illuminate us more than love. But its way is subtle, gentle, choosing to work in the background, quietly.
Its workshop is our own hearts and minds; its testing grounds, everyday life and everyday relationships. Prayer and meditation can enhance our ability to understand and practice love in daily life.
These loving experiences often leave us humbled but happy and content. Marriage, parenting, friend-ship, work, and self-esteem all improve when love is carried in one’s heart and mind.
A light heart, both in weight and luminescence, is an important part of our personal spirituality.
How do we achieve such? The answer is by doing good for others. A good heart in patience is the important point here. Letting go of what weighs our hearts down is achieved with patience.
We cannot jump straight out of our present condition into our hoped-for goal. We proceed from where we are to that goal, step by step, little by little, day by day, one situation at a time.
Whether we have a week to live or many years, today is the time to begin to lighten and enlighten our hearts and the hearts of those around us.
Understand the comment that “some grow old gracefully, some tolerantly, some fussily, and some very meanly.” The key factor may well be patience.
Love is the answer, any questions?
We came into this world to have trouble and to learn from it. Unfortunately many people don't realize this and complain about their bad luck and spend their lives chasing pleasure, fame and money. Then they die without making any spiritual progress.
And so they waste life after life. It should be obvious that all we'll take with us is our character, our karma and our abilities, and that we'll have to live with Souls like ourselves in the spirit world.
Therefore, our highest success would be to rise into the highest heaven through unselfish love. In order to become one with the Creator, work must be done to remember and find the truth.
We are all Godlings in the making, sons and daughters of Creation. While the ideal place to grow spiritually is on Earth (this is the reason for life on Earth), growth in the spirit world remains a possibility.
There, however, in the absence of a physical body, growth is more difficult. The opportunity for the full range of love (child's love, marital love, and parental love) is ideally available while on Earth.
Love which has been misused or misdirected, is best corrected in a physical life. Our ultimate purpose for existing is to again become a loving companion and co-creator with the One. If we worship the Creator within others through love, we will find the kingdom of heaven within.
By spreading love, you make the Creator stronger. By making the Creator stronger, The Creator in return, help you. But your love has to be unselfish. That is the only rule there really are.
Love is the law and the glue of the Universe.
If we live true to the spirit we came to Earth with, we can progress more quickly. We do that by expressing the love of the Creator that is within us, and we do that by loving the Creator, ourselves, and each other. It is that simple. Love never hurts.
Only the absence of love hurts. Love is really the only thing that matters. Love is joy! It all seemed so simple. If we're kind, we'll have joy.
The absolutely only thing that matters is love. Everything else, our achievements, degrees, the money we made, how many mink coats or sport cars we had, is totally irrelevant. It will also be understood that what we do is not important.
The only thing that matters is how we do what we do. And the only thing that matters is that we do what we do with love. Love is too immense and profound to ever be fully understood or experienced in this physical world.
What all people seek, what sustains them, is love, what distorts people is a lack of love. Happiness is love of something outside of self. It may never be obtained, may never be known by loving only things within self or self's own domain.
Our ultimate goal is not the complete loss of self-identity, rather, it is to know ourselves to be ourselves, yet one with the Whole.
If we do only good things we will eventually run out of bad karma and only good things will happen to us, and vice versa. The purpose of karma is to force us to learn life's lessons whether we want to or not.
The only way to bypass karma is to develop so much unselfish love that paying for bad karma will serve no purpose - much like a college student challenging a course he already knows. We evolve faster through unselfish love.
Our minds are led by the spirit we are entertaining, the spirit of the Creator or the spirit of self.
People are led astray through self-centeredness, self-gratification, self-righteousness, self-glorification, self-condemnation, self-interest, and self-consciousness. The greatest enemy we will ever face is self - the false god.
The Masters mission was to demonstrate to humanity how self-sacrifice and self-denial can overcome these selfish desires and how it leads to our complete restoration with the divine nature within us.
If everyone completely understood the afterlife, they'd quit trying to keep up with the Joneses and start learning how to live unselfishly.
Here, in the physical world, we can change ourselves quite easily and should use this life to make ourselves into the kind of people we want to be in the hereafter. The spirit world is a miserable place for anyone who hasn't learned internal harmony - characterized by unselfish love.
In the Earth realm, as in spiritual realms, until we turn our attention from ourselves, we cannot in any way change our estate.
The meaning of the terms Universal Consciousness, and Universal Mind, has little to do with the personality of the Master. These terms refer to the spiritual condition of human-divine unity or at-one-ment.
This unity is the ultimate goal of everyone and is spiritually possible for all. The Master became Universal Conscious in that he attained perfect human-divine unity. It is the Creators desire for everyone to attain this Christhood; or Buddhahood if you live in the East (same concept).
The quickest way to change the world is to be of service to others. Show that your love can make a difference in the lives of people and thereby someone else's love can make a difference in your life.
By each of us doing that and working together we change the world one inner person at a time. The good that we have done for others, all of our good deeds and kind words, will come back to us and bless us a hundred fold after this life. Our strength will be found in love.
What is important is how we show our love for the Creator by the way we treat each other. When we do unto others, we do unto our Maker and ourselves. The Creator loves and forgives us, and expects us to love and forgive others.
Whatever we become here in mortality is meaningless unless it is done for the benefit of others. Our gifts and talents are given to us to help us serve. And in serving others we grow spiritually.
Life is not about pursuits but about people. If we look after others, the maker will look after us - and do a lot better job of it than we can.
To know about love is not enough. We must express that knowing. How we do that is up to us.
Love unselfishly as much as you can, by all the means you can, in all the ways you can, at all the places you can, during all the times you can, for as many people as you can, for as long as you can. Then you will be able to worship the Maker within everyone and everything.
There are only two things we can take with us at death: love and knowledge. This is why it is best to learn about both as much as possible. No one can truly fathom the great truths of life until they finally unite with eternity after death.
In the spiritual universe, sin is not seen in the same way as it is here. In the spirit world, all things are learning experiences. We are here in this world to make mistakes, to learn and grow from them.
We should learn from our mistakes. The Creator wants us to do what we want to do. That means making choices - and there isn't necessarily any right choice. There is a spectrum of possibilities, and we should make the best choice from those possibilities.
If we do that, we will receive help from the Other Side, but hardships are necessary for soul growth. We need negative experiences as well as positive experiences in life because before we can feel joy, we must know sorrow.
Every experience is a tool for you to grow by. Negative experiences allow you to obtain greater understanding about yourself until you learn to avoid those experiences.
Spiritually, we are at various degrees of light - which is knowledge/insight - and because of our divine, spiritual nature we are filled with the desire to do good.
The only thing you take with you when you die is the love you give away. A soul is given the time it needs to turn away from its selfish ways and, like the prodigal son, return home to a feast of joy and welcome from its Father in heaven.
Reincarnation is the method that allows the soul enough time to correct its mistakes and develop itself. We are not human beings having a spiritual experience. We are spiritual beings having a human experience.
Love is a sign from the heavens that you are here for a reason. To love another person is to help them love the Creator. Love cannot save life from death, but it can fulfill life's purpose. Love is the triumph of imagination over intelligence. Love is the only thing that we can carry with us when we go, and it makes the end so easy.
Compiled In Love
I am humbly
Rene’ Descartes, HumansAreFree.com